So what the hell is this? Why would Superman need a gun? He’s Superman. And don’t try to tell me that it’s not supposed to be Superman’s gun – it has his “S” right on it! And it’s clearly supposed to be from the film Man of Steel because it has the Henry Cavill’s likeness right on the box. I know that when you make a big movie like this you have to sell some toys too, but this baffles me. Why a gun? Not only does Superman not need a gun, but even if he did, he would never use one. This is ass.
I desperately want everyone to refer to Man of Steel as Superman Returns Again. (For some reason, that is very funny to me.) Anyway, Man of Steel is a bit of mess (yet still entertaining), and so, my review is also just a rambling jumble of headings, a list that is trying to find its place on the internet, much like Superman trying to find his place in the world. See what I did there? Yeah, the movie is just as subtle as this review. Read the rest of this entry
This is the worst thing to happen to Superman since… I dunno…. Superman III? Superman IV? Superman Returns? When Superman died in the 90s and then came back to life with a mullet?
I guess the implication is that he’s so strong that no razor would be up to the task of trimming his mighty hairs (except Gillette, apparently), but as for me, I don’t know how Superman shaves and I don’t care. But I’ll play their game for a second. Maybe he uses his super face muscles to retract or expel the unwanted growth. (And, for that matter, how does he cut his hair?) Maybe he bounces his laser eye beams off some super hard surface and does it that way. Or, maybe it has something to do with him being an alien with super powers who doesn’t exist and when the script says he has a beard, he has a beard, and when it says he’s clean-shaven, he just is!!