Blog Archives

You’ve gone incognito.

youve-gone-incognito

(This image has been translated)

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again:  the incognito web browser setting has only one purpose.  You know what it is; I don’t need to – well, I guess I did already spell it out for you in the above image.  Anyway, the future sure is exactly what George Lucas promised us in THX 1138.*

*Wow, what an obscure reference to about one second of film from a movie nobody saw.

Fun with Google Autocomplete (part 2)

Last time on Fun with Google Autocomplete, we learned that Americans were bad at history and distinguishing between fantasy and reality. This time, we see that Google is doing a great job of anticipating our concerns about the NFL and their most notorious players. Read the rest of this entry

Fun with Google Autocomplete

Google autocomplete can get you some really fun results. Google describes their autocomplete system results as follows:

The search queries that you see as part of Autocomplete are a reflection of the search activity of users and the content of web pages indexed by Google.

That one bit: “reflection of the search activity of users” means there is a little bit of us in those auto complete results. Unfortunately, we’re not so smart.  For example, here’s what you get when you type “when did:”

image

Okay America; we need to study our history a bit better. But it gets worse:

image

Only one of those things about Patrick Stewart are true. Why are we searching for things that have not happened? Let’s all buckle down and do better, America!

Google’s Olympics Doodle takes a shot at Russia’s weird Homosexuality laws

Google’s one of the biggest, most profitable companies in America and yet, they still have no problem thumbing their collective nose at a country like Russia, even though it could potentially cost them a ton of money. (Vladimir Putin strikes me as the sort of guy who would do his best to block Google from Russian ISPs.) This sorta thing makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside! (Not warm enough to watch the opening ceremonies in their entirety or something like that, but still, ya know… USA! USA! USA!) We screw up a lot on the international stage, so it’s nice to see us get one right every once and a while.

Google Uses the Power of Triangles and the Letter G to Control the Universe

I’m a happy Google user. I like their products and nitpicking aside, I don’t have any complaints. We live in Google’s world now – we just sort of woke up here one day, but how’d that happen? It’s simple: triangles. Google has utilized the power of the triangle and repetitive use of the letter G to take over the world!

Triangles, as you well know, have long been revered as mystic symbols by both the ancient and modern world because, unlike a circle or a square, you can turn a triangle 90 degrees and it looks different while the other shapes do not. Obviously. Duh. Pointing a triangle up means male, down means female… opposite stuff like that. And then there’s stuff that comes in threes, like the past, present and future, celebrity deaths and, of course, the Holy Trinity (Babe Ruth, Lou Gehrig and Joe DiMaggio.) Anyway, triangles are gangsta.

As aforementioned, Google runs the world: they disseminate information (and doodles!) and own some of the most popular websites on the web. (Google.com is number one and YouTube.com is number 3, so that means pretty much everyone uses Google for something. Oh, and BlogSpot.com is number fifteen, so… yeah, also Google.) Just accept that Google is the most powerful entity on earth (followed closely by Michael Bloomberg, who some how changed the New York City term limit law so he could run for another term) and now focus on how they did it: again, triangles. You think I’m joking? I am NOT joking! Look at their icons! Look at all the triangles! You might say, "Oh, that’s just poor design – they all look so similar, I can barely tell them apart. It’s a good thing YouTube and Play aren’t on the same line in that new drop down! And why does the icon for Drive look like the recycle symbol? Anyway, the triangles are a coincidence."

To which I respond: I DISAGREE, SIR/MADAM! Look how many triangles they wedged into the Play icon! And the Google maps icon! That’s no mistake! And the Drive icon is really just a big triangle pointing up (So Drive is a dude?) instead of pointing to the right like YouTube and Play! Look how they wedged a triangle into the News and Calendar icons! Those don’t need to be there! And GMAIL! LOOK AT THE GMAIL ICON! LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK!

While I’m talking about the icons, Search and Google+? I can barely tell you guys apart. I know Google is all about the G, but somebody needs to fix that. And I get that Mr. G has some sort of weird malevolent-funk, hypnotic power, but… I…

Oh Golly, that’s Good how Great the letter G is…

What was I saying? Oh yeah, it’s all Triangles and Gs, and it’s how they maintain power. You might not believe me now, but when Google opens a new world headquarters that’s shaped like a pyramid and has a giant G on each side, maybe you’ll begin to understand exactly what’s happening here… but by then, it’ll be too late. We’ll all be wearing Google Glass, watching YouTube on our Android phones and tablets while ordering the latest Chrome Cast on our Chrome Books while simultaneously using voice to text to document our thoughts on BlogSpot.

Huh, I suddenly have an irresistible desire to join the tips of my thumbs and then the tips of my index fingers together… no. No! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Google Doodle: Roswell UFO Sighting

google-doodle-66th-anniversary-of-the-roswell-ufo-incidents-reportingIf you’re not familiar with the term ‘Google Doodle,’ it’s the name that they give those commemorative drawings as seen above.  But sometimes, they’re more than just a pretty picture, and the Doodle of the Roswell UFO sighting is one of those times.
Read the rest of this entry

Google invites you to taste the rainbow, Gay Marriage style

If you didn’t already notice, when you search ‘gay marriage‘ at Google, the site whips out a rainbow boarder. It’s the best thing since searching "Do a barrel roll"

I think Zoosk might be advertising on YouTube

zoosk

Nearly every single video I’ve watched on YouTube in the last week or so has been preceded by this ad for Zoosk, which is some sort of online dating service.  If I see that damn puppet one more time, I’m going to stab it right in the…

zoosk-heart-puppet

Uhm… face?  Because its entire body seems to be made of a heart, so…  I guess I’ll just keep stabbing it until it’s dead.

To be fair, t he commercial is kinda funny, but I’m totally sick of it.  Why is Google targeting me with this ad?  I guess because I’m a dude, and dudes are always looking for dates, I guess.  Well whatever, Google – I’m very happy with Dr. Girlfriend – thanks for checking.

You just can’t log out of Google anymore

I don’t spend a lot of time worrying about my digital life – identify theft, account hacks, stolen passwords…  it’s not something I think about.  Google’s modifications to their systems haven’t really changed that, but I did notice that logging out doesn’t work they way it used to, and I’m a bit annoyed. Read the rest of this entry

Shameless Afternoon Self Promotion

It’s been crazy around here at CreativeJamie.com – yesterday was the website’s busies day in terms of views – 303! That tops the old standard busiest day ever by… a lot. I think it used to be 178, until that got crushed last week and every day since. Yesterday was the first day the site broke 300 page views. Hardcore! Read the rest of this entry

A Quick Thank You

jamie-insalaco

“Thanks!” | “Meow!”

I just wanted to take a quick moment to say thanks to everyone who has been following the blog via email, Twitter, Facebook, Google+ or any of the 90 million other ways we stay in touch these days.  I really appreciate that you take time out of your day to visit the site, ‘Like’ a post, rate a post via the stars, share it on your social network, drop a comment…  or any of the 90 million other things you can do at the bottom of each post.

If you have any suggestions, questions, comments or complaints, feel free to drop a comment or send me an email.  Maybe there’s a particular type of post you’d like to see more or less of… whatever, just let me know.  I can’t promise I’ll be able to make everyone happy, but I’ll do my best to accommodate.  For example, A Fly On The Wall:  Michael Jordan And His Hitler Mustache is one of the most popular posts on the site of all time, and AFOTW is something I’ve been meaning to get back to, but I haven’t been able to find the right topic, so any suggestions would be welcomed.

Ways to connect:
There are a zillion ways for us to stay connected.  Here are the ones I do my best to support:

We’re on Instagram!
You can find CreativeJamie.com on Instagram… however you do that.  Seriously, I have no idea how to point you to our account.

Follow Via Email
This one is infallible; if you subscribe to the site via email, you’ll never miss a thing.  If you’re like me and you’re always connected to email, than this is the best way to follow the blog. To Follow Via Email, find this widget and enter your email address.  It looks like this:

follow-creativejamie-com

It’s NOT form of stalking. It’s a form of AWESOME!

twitter
Twitter is another great way to follow the blog as each time a post goes live, a note with a link is sent to Twitter automatically, so this way is also rock solid.  I consider myself fairly internet savvy, and I can post messages to Twitter without a problem, but following other people has proven to be a bit difficult for me.  (I mean, I can click the ‘follow’ button without a problem, but I find the feed difficult to read.)  I know there are these things called hash tags and I should be using them for… something…  but I don’t, and I’m flat out awful at having a conversation.  I’ll try to figure that Twitter thing out at some point so I can use it more effectively.  Practice makes perfect, I suppose.

facebook
I really hate the ‘Timeline’ thing.  I never used Facebook much before that update, but I’m even less inclined to use anything but the news feed now.  Anyway, Facebook is another great way to follow the blog as each time a post goes live, a note with a link is sent to Facebook automatically, so this way is also rock solid.  I’m also trying to do a ‘link of the day’ here, which just something I found on the net that I thought was worth a look.

you tube
YouTube is another place to see the few tiny videos I’ve been able to crank out rather than using the Video category link above.  If you have a YouTube/Google account and follow the blog there, new videos will come up in your Subscriptions… you probably know all this already.

google plus
As of right now, I’m not using this much, but if the interface between my site’s host and Google+ improves, that could change.

ebay
Hopefully, I’ll start posting more stuff to eBay soon.  As fair warning, it’s going to be a lot of old comic books, so I don’t blame you if that doesn’t peak your interest.  Oh, and Star Wars stuff… there was this two or three year period where I was buying Star Wars stuff and people were buying me Star Wars stuff… and it got totally out of hand.  Anyway, every little bit helps as there are tons of things I’d like to do on the blog (particularly video stuff) that I just can’t afford right now.  The website has a few costs associated with it, but until I actually start uploading video, they’re fairly minimum on an annual basis.  Still, they’re there, and they are not fun.

rss
Does anyone still use RSS?  Am I fool for not using it ever?  Anyway, it’s available here.

Contact via email
You can send an email to creativejamiecom [at] gmail [dot] com or use this form.

Google+ or Oh Goody, Another Social Network!

If you’re not already following CreativeJamie.com on Twitter and Facebook… well, you could. Frankly, I’m content if you come to the site and read the posts – if you drop a comment, I’m ecstatic. If you use one of the social medias and make this site a part of your experience, I’m grateful. As for me, I’m fairly lost in the social networking wilderness.

Twitter is pretty self explanatory – I only use it for CreativeJamie.com and BomberBanter.com (no personal account) and besides alerts for new posts, I primarily only tweet at the latter. Twitter is what it is – it’s kind of a mess, but at least there isn’t a ton of extraneous nonsense. As for Facebook, I figured out how to make the alerts for new posts go to my personal page (which is almost entirely populated with alerts for new posts at BB and CJ), but not quite to the Facebook pages for the respective sites. I try to check out people’s updates… but I get discouraged quickly. I don’t care that someone parked across three spaces at your office, that your sunglasses fell apart again, or that you made a great dinner.

For me, Twitter and Facebook are a fairly significant amount of social media to manage on their own, and given that I’m not especially interested, it’s tough to get up the motivation to actually do anything manually. If not for the automatic alerts for new posts (bless you, WordPress software!), my Facebook and Twitter would be sparse indeed.

But now, I find myself using Google+, the social networking offering from the search giant that their shareholders have been clamoring for. I’ve never been a heavy Facebook user, but I have to say that in comparison, Google+ is a lot easier, cleaner and less befuddling to use. I haven’t received a single invitation to tour someone’s farm, participate in a gang fight or help someone get food out to a customer in time. The Streams (sounds filthy… or like Ghostbusters: “Don’t cross the streams!”) of family, friends and acquaintances is much easier to navigate than Facebook’s mash up of people you know (their group tool doesn’t do it for me) or MySpace’s advertising-lain distopia. (Maybe Justin Timberlake can fix it, Napster style.)

As much as I can go on and sing the praises of Google+ and it’s superior formatting and user experiences, for me, outside of letting folks know what’s going on at the blog, it’s still a social network and social networking is fairly pointless. For example, last night: my girlfriend was so impressed at my arrangement of taco salad on my plate that she encouraged me to take a photo, which I did, and it occurred to me that as I took the pic with my new phone, I could easily send it somewhere, but… does anyone really care that we’re proud of our dinner? Probably not.

But I’m on Google+ now. Check out my dinner!

vegan nachos daiya cheese

My vegan nachos - that's daiya cheese!

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