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Sarah Palin needs a TV show

Never before has someone come into the limelight and said so much while not saying anything at all.  What the hell is Sarah Palin talking about?  Here it from the pit bull’s mouth…  I mean grizzly bear… whatever.  I can’t keep track of her metaphors anymore.

If you can find a minority in that video, I will send you a free t-shirt.  I’m pretty sure there is just one, and she’s only there for an instant.  Anyway, they’re gonna do something about… something.  I saw some posters in there, but I didn’t hear a single issue out of Mrs. Palin’s mouth.

Oh, and the posters are kinda funny.  The ‘WE DONT CARE FOR OBAMA CARE’ lady also doesn’t care for punctuation; take that, apostrophe!  This lady and her ‘NO GOVERNMENT RUN HEALTH CARE’ partner are essentially the sole bringers of any message whatsoever to the video.  The lady who wants to, ‘ANNOY LIBERAL WORK HARD & PAY YOUR OWN BILLS’ has a vendetta against one particular liberal and couldn’t be bothered to write out her sign in pencil first, which she should have done since she doesn’t have the skill to estimate the length of the word, ‘bills.’  The ‘Don’t Tread On Me’ lady came to play, rollin’ in her ride.   Everybody else is pretty much a fanboy:  ‘WE [HEART] SARAH + USA’ lady is making a bold declaration:  you love Sarah and the USA?  There is a lot of love in your heart, ma’am.  One young lady loves Sarah because ‘she loves my country’ which I guess is OK, but way to hog up the entire country for yourself, kid.  You’re probably a big on canning, but whatever.  Another woman labeled herself as a ‘tax-bled hockey mom.’  So I guess the Bush tax cuts didn’t work out for  you?  And I would have loved to have played ice hockey when I was a kid, but it cost a fortune, so if your kid is playing ice hockey, you and your family are probably doing OK.

“This year will be remembered as a year common-sense conservative women get things done for our country,” she says in an advertisement released Thursday by her political action committee. “It seems like it’s kind of a mom awakening in the last year and a half, where women are rising up and saying, ‘No, we’ve had enough already,’ because moms kind of just know when something’s wrong.”

Wow, you went to college, huh?  “because moms kind of just know when something’s wrong.”  That is some sound reasoning right there.   Read that again:  “because moms kind of just know when something’s wrong.”  What?  Kind of just?  Is this intuition, or is she using the force, or what?  Any by ‘what,’ I mean, what’s wrong with her? Doesn’t she have a degree in COMMUNICATION?  Shouldn’t someone who majored in broadcast journalism know not to put those words together in that order?

“If you thought pit bulls were tough, well you don’t want to mess with the mama grizzlies,” Ms. Palin says.

Tough, huh?  Like when you were tough during the election of 2008?  When you were complaining that Charie Gibson didn’t define the Bush Doctrine for you before he asked you what it was and if you agreed with it?  You were the Republican Candidate for Vice President – if someone asks you if you agree with a policy created by either President Bush, you say, “yes!” you idiot!

Or maybe you were being a true grizzly when you had to have John McCain chaperon a second interview with a cream puff like Katie Couric because your answer to the hardball question, “What newspapers and magazines do you read?” was, “All of them.”  And then McCain had to make an ass out of himself and tell Couric it was ‘a gotcha question’ – Couric might as well of laughed in his face.  How hard would it have been to say, “The Anchorage Daily News,” or, “I’m Governor of Alaska, a wife and a mother, and I have a staff – so I depend on my staff to bring the important news items of the day to my attention,” or even, “McCalls.  Reading is ‘me’ time.”

The goal of this video is to remind you that you’re angry.  What are you angry about?  Well, there were some signs to plant some subliminal messages in your mind, but nothing from Sarah. It’s time for Mrs. Palin to get a Maury Povich styled talk show and step out of the political arena.  She’s just too crazy and she obviously loves money and attention, so TV is the best spot for her.

Or she’s too vague for politics… that’s it, she’s crazy vague.  I think a sitcom could work, and hell, if Palin won’t do it, bring in Tina Fay.  30 Rock is awesome.

tina fay as sarah palin

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