A December Bride (2016) movie review
I can scarcely recall a Christmas movie I dislike as much as A December Bride. It’s not that the flick is poorly constructed but rather the nails-on-chalkboard quality that its dialogue, scenes and very plot envokes.
The movie features all the nuance of a hand grenade while transitioning from moment to moment with the precision of a corning garbage truck. Every phrase insults the very fiber of my being with its obvious nature. I loathe the word program from which this heinous piece of Hallmark Channel filler was spawned.
I am certain that each second of the 84 minute running time has some how furthered the cause of propaganda, racism and Lord Voldemort. A December Bride somehow disrupts the spacetime continuum and will most likely alter reality as we know it if enough people watch the movie.
And by all that, I mean I don’t recommend you watch A December Bride.