Wish Upon a Christmas (2015) movie review
I have a million questions about Wish Upon A Christmas. And here they are!
Is that the opening theme from Home Alone?
Holy hell, is that kid 38?
Is that a Canon camera product?
What the hell was that explosion? Did a meteor hit the earth or did Santa just crash and die?
Is that the Up In The Air screenplay?
Is that Bad Santa?
Is that Alan Thicke?
Why does no one at this factory know the words Hark The Herald Angels Sing? The humming is kind of terrifying.
Why are they still making ornaments on December 24th?
Is that the necklace from Men in Black? Or is it a snitch? A silver snitch? I thought they were gold. (Silver Snitch sounds like a specific kind of porn.)
Does the guy running the factory not know how business works?
Was that kid in the photo the same kid?
Does this lady run a dinner or a daycare?
Do you think Alan Thicke wanted to be in this movie?
The factory Christmas party is on Christmas Eve? Because these people don’t have families?
Is the French martini joke the worst joke ever?
Did the lady protagonist just say the moral of A Christmas Carol is “greed is good?”
Does this kid just carry the book, the magnifying glass and the sleigh part around with him?
Is this the worst version of”Jingle Bells” ever?
Wow, does this factory not have quality control? The Christmas lights at an ornament factory don’t work? Why do all the ornaments have different pictures of the same dude?
She’s humming now, too? So she joined their cult?
Did the kid just quote A Christmas Carol?
What the hell is happening in the photos in this guy’s house?
Did that kid just invent a bat signal for Santa?
Was Alan Thicke literally phoning it in?
Oh wait, so now it’s Christmas Eve? Not yesterday?
Is that dog someone’s dog?
Is she really canning people on Christmas Eve?
Does “the chocolate ones” mean poop?
Is the factory really called Donner? Like Donner party?
Couldn’t this guy just sell his mansion to save his business?
So this kid is going to murder everyone and make himself suits out of their skins?
Did that lady find the snitch? Did Gryffindor just win?
Does this lady not know the difference between whistling and humming?
Does this kid love baseball and American football?
Is Santa on Atkins?
Wait, Santa didn’t need the damn ball after all?
Is lady protagonist getting her mom’s head in a box for Christmas?
Why can’t this kid read?!?