Things I learn from Election 2016

Congratulations, America. You just elected the first president EVER with no political or military experience. I’m sure this’ll go great. With that in mind, here’s a rundown of things I learned from the 2016 election of Donald Trump.

Evangelical Christians are the hypocrites I always took them for. You just can’t square devotion to Jesus with voting for Trump. It’s impossible. Square peg, round hole.

People are more sexist than racist. In post 9/11 America, a black man with a Muslim name won two presidential elections but a woman the Republicans spent in the neighborhood of $100 million dollars investigating (and then exonerating) got edged out by an orange fascist. Can you imagine people’s reaction if Hillary Clinton cheated on her first spouse with her second and her second with her third and had children by all three?

scanners exploding head

Most polls include only landline calls and are English only. That’s probably not a great way to collect data.

Americans aren’t interested in facts.


FBI director James Coney is a real shit.

White rage is alive and well in rural America. An endorsement from the KKK is apparently not a turnoff for these people. (Not to mention the dozens of other Trump negatives.)

The first race in 50 years without the protection of the Voting Rights Act was a shocking upset. We shouldn’t be surprised by this.

I thought people voted for President Obama twice because he was the best person for the job. Now I know they voted for him because he’s charismatic, genuinely a cool guy and a great salesman. Hillary Clinton is, by contrast, A NERD!!! If George W. Bush was “the kind of guy you wanted to have a beer with,” Trump is… what? The kind of guy you want to do a line with and then hit the brothel? That’s what America wants – a buddy to do the town with, not a leader. With Obama, it’s one and the same, but Hillary’s just the most qualified person to ever run for the presidency, but not somebody Americans want to meet for happy hour.

The Electoral College is stupid.


as of 11/15/2016, Clinton is up by 798,790 popular votes

Americans don’t learn. We gave George W. Bush a second term. We see what Brexit is doing to the UK. And we voted Trump in anyway. It’s the very definition of illogical.

This is on us, America. I have no sympathy for the citizenry. We know what Donald Trump is and we did this with our eyes open. We deserve whatever we get.

Which I assume will start with repealing and replacing the Affordable Care Act with “something terrific.”

About Jamie Insalaco

Jamie Insalaco is the author of, and editor in chief of

Posted on November 9, 2016, in Politics and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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