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A Christmas Detour movie review

A-Christmas-Detour

It’s a movie as insincere as this green screen publicity photo, and more than that, it’s a Volcano/Dante’s Peak situation as this is exact same movie as Lifetime’s The Flight Before Christmas (both movies are new this year).  I give you HIV victim hating Candace Cameron Bure’s A Christmas Detour. 

The acting is usually the bright spot in these made for TV Christmas movies, but man, Candace Cameron Bure is bad in this movie – like, really, really, really bad.  There’s a scene where she’s supposed to cry and holy hell, does she phone it in.  She couldn’t be bothered to squeeze out even one measly tear, never mind put in any effort into her performance.  Some of the time, she at least has a pulse, but there are a few scenes were her performance just defies all logic.  It’s like they did one take of every shot and moved on – it looks as though they filmed this movie in a week.  There’s also an establishing shot of a house in the Hamptons that looks like a model in front of green screen.  The proportions of the house and the background objects is just wrong – it looks like hell.

Then there’s the details of the plot…  it is insane.  I’ll leave it at that.  But, this movie does know their Greater New York City geography, I’ll give ’em that.

Another thing that is awful about A Christmas Detour is the relentless music.  There is constantly some ridiculous royalty free BS music that doesn’t necessarily match the scene… but I suspect it’s there because the tunes are very silly and it’s trying to subliminally tell the audience, “This movie is fun!  We’re having a good time!  Candace Cameron is totally not just here for a quick paycheck!”

As for a bright side… the movie is relatively well-directed (from a technical film making standpoint – how that crying shot got into the movie, I’ll never know) and the editing is fast paced and allows for moments when the actors can play out their emotions in their expressions, which is kinda my favorite thing in a flick and is certainly the best moments in this film.

You know who’s really good in this?  Supporting actress  Sarah Strange.  She’s charming as hell and, in a move upwards (of sorts), will star in Kindergarten Cop 2 with Dolph Lundgren.  Yes, that is a real thing!  It’s due out next year.

As watching both films would be cruel and unusual punishment (trust me), I’ll have to recommend either the hot flaming pile that is A Christmas Detour or the nostalgia driven The Flight Before Christmas…  and I’ll have to go with the latter.  Sure, TFBC is trash, but it at least has some camp value.  This movie is just bad.  I guess?  Wait, actually, Detour is more fun to watch because of its crap factor while TFBC is super boring, so…

It’s like choosing between your dog having diarrhea on the wall to wall carpet or on the couch – you’re screwed either way.

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About Jamie Insalaco

Jamie Insalaco is the author of CreativeJamie.com, BomberBanter.com and editor in chief of ComicBookClog.com

Posted on December 8, 2015, in christmas blog posts, movie review, tv review and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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