Jurassic Park Imax 3D movie review

jurassic_park_3d-imax*I feel that I should preface this by stating that I’m not the biggest Jurassic Park fan.

We saw Jurassic Park in IMAX 3D on Sunday, and, after 20 years, it’s still just Jurassic Park.

I understand that for many of you, stating that “it’s still just Jurassic Park” is something of an insult, but I don’t mean it to be. It’s a fine movie, but I just don’t love it, and most people seem to love it. To me, it’s a slasher movie – a less interesting version of Jaws, a film where the antagonist has no motivation other than it’s desire to eat – although Jaws is a bit more complicated than that. Still, Jurassic Park is more about the then state of the art special effects that brought dinosaurs to life in a way we’d never seen before. (Rather than… well, a story, a plot or slasher conventions.) Today, this kind of technology is par for the course, but when the movie came out, Jurassic Park was the craziest thing we’d seen to date. Still, I’ve never been able to get passed the fact that it’s a slasher movie without any real scares, even if the premise and the characters are a bit more interesting than your typical slasher movie. Still, Jaws was scary – if Jaws didn’t make you think twice about swimming in the ocean, then you probably didn’t see the movie. Jurassic Park just didn’t scare me. At all.

As for this 20th anniversary release, Jurassic Park in IMAX 3D looks about as good as any other 3D conversion you’ve seen, except that it doesn’t suffer from any darkening issues that I’d seen in early 3D conversions. However, some scenes did seem a little blurry, and this was especially true when the background of a shot is out of focus – these soft backgrounds are soft and blurry to begin with, but in IMAX, it looks truly bizarre. On the other hand, we got a giant, partially shirtless Jeff Goldblum, so.. thanks? It didn’t feel like they really did anything besides run the movie through a program to convert it to 3D and maybe expand the aspect ratio to make it fit the IMAX format – they didn’t even bother redoing the titles or the credits in 3D or even give us anything new or special – maybe a digital shot of the dinosaur spitting its venom into the camera? Give us something for our money! But they didn’t. Still, it was fun to see it up on the big screen, but if I were you, I’d skip the 3D, and that seems to mean skipping the IMAX, too – but do yourself a favor and just let it be what it is.

And now, my airing of gripes about the movie…

Why do we care that Newman’s shaving cream can got buried in the mud?
Is that a sequel setup? Does it ever come up again in parts two or three? If it does, I certainly don’t remember that…

Why’s that dinosaur sick? In the movie, this scene just separates one character from the others, and I’m sure that’s its purpose in the book as well, but in the book, the thread gets tied off, and the movie it doesn’t because… I dunno. Seems like one more line of dialogue would have done it, but whatever.

What happened to Jeff Goldblum? Why is he hurt, exactly? If it’s in the movie, I miss it every time. I remember him running with the flair, and then they find him lying on the ground. I think his leg is cut, because he has set up a tourniquet with his belt… but what happened? I have no idea.

The toilet scene. I really hate that the lawyer gets eaten off a toilet. I know he wasn’t using it, but the image just irks me and makes something that should be scary into something that’s silly.

“Rrr… maybe you should take a gun, too.” When the hunter and the doctor go out to restore the power, only the hunter takes a gun. There were plenty of guns, and shooting a shotgun isn’t exactly rocket science…

“Run! But let’s hug first!” Remember when Dr. Grant and… you know, the other doctor that’s Dr. Grant’s girlfriend get reunited? She’s like “Run!” but first, she runs over to him and rather than grabbing his hand and continuing to run, she leaps into his arms and wraps her legs around him… while being chased by a dinosaur that the movie tells us can run 60 miles per hour. Good strategy! Does Dr. Grant have a shotgun in this scene? Or does he just show up with it in the dinning room? Aren’t the shotguns kept in the bunker? Did he really have time to go down there? Whatever.

Multiple Shots do nothing? Before Dr. Grant’s gun jams, we hear (via phone) several shots discharged. You’d think firing a shot gun at point blank range would at least have some effect on the dinosaurs, but nope. Also, the shotgun jammed? Really? I guess that’s a thing that happens, but… really? Kinda seems like the shotgun jammed so the chase could go on for a while longer. Again, not sure where that shotgun came from in the first place.

Get the gun, you stupid kid! Before the gun jams, Dr. Grant and the other doctor that’s Dr. Grant’s girlfriend are trying to hold the door closed while the young lady is using the computer system to lock the door. Her brother, with nothing to do, just keeps banging on the top of her chair, impatiently. Meanwhile, Dr. Grant and the lady Doctor are trying to hold the door closed and reach the gun at the same time. Maybe the kid could have walked over there and grabbed the gun and handed it to them? Or better yet, fired it into the open door? That would have been more helpful than doing nothing. Which is what he does.

Nevertheless, Jurassic Park is still a tight, fun movie. It’s just not as good everyone says it is – at least not for me. I give Jurassic Park an 8 out of 10. I think that’s a fair score – it’s good, and the visuals were groundbreaking at the time, but the flick is missing something.

About Jamie Insalaco

Jamie Insalaco is the author of CreativeJamie.com, BomberBanter.com and editor in chief of ComicBookClog.com

Posted on April 8, 2013, in movie review and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

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