Gov Christie Didn’t like Pres Obama’s Inauguration Speech

chris-christie-2016As you know, President Obama has been sworn in for his second term as President of the United States.  Despite the Inauguration occurring on Martin Luther King Jr Day, most of us had to work and missed the festivities.  And it’s a good thing, too – Governor Christie didn’t enjoy the speech, so I’m sure that means it was a pinko commie manifesto that tarnishes this great country.  Let’s take a look.

I checked a bunch of websites and they all had the same 5 quotes or so that they considered the highlights of the Inaugural Speech.  First, let’s hear what Christie’s reaction was.

“I think his inaugural address – instead of trying to bring people together – was a manifesto for ‘Hey, its my way of or the highway’ and I don’t think that that is necessarily productive,” Christie said.

Wow, he actually used the word ‘manifesto?’  Ha!  That is awesome.  I was just kidding about that.

“My fellow Americans, we are made for this moment, and we will seize it – so long as we seize it together.”

Now THAT is a divisive comment.

“We, the people, still believe that our obligations as Americans are not just to ourselves, but to all posterity.”

Ah, I see the problem – he said, “all” instead of “all Americans” or something like that.  Damn pinko.

“We will defend our people and uphold our values through strength of arms and rule of law.  We will show the courage to try and resolve our differences with other nations peacefully – not because we are naive about the dangers we face, but because engagement can more durably lift suspicion and fear.”

Huh.  Not sure what Christie is complaining about there.  Obama says we’ll shoot people if we have to, but he’d rather not.  I would think Christie would like that as Christie is into destroying his enemies but also likes to save money, and shooting people is probably fine with Christie, but shooting a lot of people gets expensive after a while.

“We, the people, declare today that the most evident of truths – that all of us are created equal – is the star that guides us still; just as it guided our forebears through Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall; just as it guided all those men and women, sung and unsung, who left footprints along this great Mall, to hear a preacher say that we cannot walk alone; to hear a King proclaim that our individual freedom is inextricably bound to the freedom of every soul on Earth.”

Well, he’s just acknowledging Martin Luther King Jr Day there.  Not sure why that’s a problem.

“We cannot mistake absolutism for principle, or substitute spectacle for politics, or treat name-calling as reasoned debate.”

That sounds fair.  What’s the problem with that?

Excuse me for a sec, folks – I’m going to address the President directly.

Mr. President:

As far as I can tell, your speech seemed fairly even keeled.  I guess you’ll only make the Republicans happy if you simply step up to the mic and read A Pledge to America.  You just can’t win with these guys, so don’t try.  If you mention anything that comes even close to a policy stance in a speech, they jump all over you like Honey Boo Boo at a Shoney’s buffet.* My advice to you, sir, is to just go out there and do your thing and to hell with those dudes.  It’s not like you’ll ever have to run for office again, anyway.

Oh, and make all of your future entrances like this:

obama-skateboarding-gif

Peace!
The J-Dogg
Jamie Insalaco

*How’s that for a topical reference?

About Jamie Insalaco

Jamie Insalaco is the author of CreativeJamie.com, BomberBanter.com and editor in chief of ComicBookClog.com

Posted on January 26, 2013, in Politics and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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