New Jersey Absentee Ballot and the awesome third party names

One of my buddies is not able to make it home to vote this year, and he is getting his New Jersey Absentee Ballot on.  Kind soul that he is and being well aware of my pension for all things wacky, he sent me a pic so I could enjoy the names of the various political parties.

nj-2012-election-sample-ballot-presidentObviously, we’ve got the usual suspects, standard thirty party participants and a few ones that are too awesome to ignore:

Green Party
Socialism and Liberation
Socialist Workers Party
Constitution Party
NSA Did 911
American Third Position
Libertarian Party
NJ Justice Party

Wow!  I have three winners here!

Bronze Medal:  NJ Justice Party
Sounds like something you came up with when you were a kid, right?  “I’m going to run for president and change this country!  Because I believe in Justice!  Justice for all!  But mostly for people in New Jersey!  I shall form the NJ Justice Party, and we will party with that statue of Justice all night long!   She won’t be blind to the good times my administration brings to bear!”

Silver Medal:  American Third Position
I didn’t look into it, so I don’t know the answer, but what is the American Third Position?  (We’re talking about sex, right?)  Is it…  hmm…  is it doggy style?  Is that the American Third Position?  Perhaps it’s Reverse Cowgirl?  No Idea…

Gold Medal:  NSA Did 911
That is a dynamite name for a political party!  If you’re not familiar with Jeff Boss… well, you should look him up, because he’s a cook of the highest order.  Here are some of his awesome campaign posters from a while back.  (The dude is always running for something.)  And, in case it’s not clear, he insists that the NSA planned and executed the 911 terror attacks to get the Patriot Act passed, and he witnessed it.  And he has video proof…  something like that.

About Jamie Insalaco

Jamie Insalaco is the author of, and editor in chief of

Posted on October 12, 2012, in election 2012 and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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