Real Life Super Hero Phoenix Jones

Scorpion Mortal Kombat

Scorpion to purse snatchers: "Get Over Here!"

Some things are just irresistible… you have to blog about them, even if they are old news and you meant to write something about it a month ago.

It was only a matter of time before somebody decided that they needed to put on a crazy costume and start patrolling the streets.  In fact, I seriously doubt this is the first time someone has taken a crack at being a super hero, but this is the first interview I’ve seen one do, I will say that.

So here we have Phoenix Jones – he’s wearing a bullet proof vest and knife plates and donned in a costume that reminds me of Scorpion from Mortal Kombat.  I was sure he’d get hit with a lawsuit before he’d get the key to Seattle, because obviously,  you cant walk around tasering people, even if they are breaking the law.  That’s not how society works.

And then, this happened:

Now I certainly didn’t want anything to happen to this guy, and I’m sorry it did.  It sounds like he didn’t suffer any serious injuries, but the national media is starting to turn on this guy and his boys (he has homies who are also super heroes… a West Coast Avengers sort of thing, I guess), and that’s never good for anybody.  It’s funny to hear serious conversations on TV that media has in comic books about;, saying Batman is a lawless vigilante or have somebody put forth essentially the exact same argument in almost the exact same words as J. Jonah Jameson does in Spider-Man:  “He’s a menace!”

A word of caution to wanna be super heroes:  don’t do it.  Don’t even draw up costume ideas for fun.  Trust me, I’ve been reading comics… well, since I’ve been able to read, and trust me:  you don’t have a chance.  If you’re lucky, you’ll spend a night in jail and ending up a paying a fine.  If you’re not… you’ll end up dead.

NOTE: Just wanted to mention that a fair amount of my blog ideas come from my buddy over at  If you’re into Jeeps, those dudes are your peeps…

About Jamie Insalaco

Jamie Insalaco is the author of, and editor in chief of

Posted on January 23, 2011, in comic book reviews, observations and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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