Thanks so much to everyone for visiting the site, hitting the like button, rating posts, dropping comments, following on Facebook, Twitter and WordPress – all that jazz! It may sound silly, but I greatly appreciate it. Just knowing that people are out there reading the stuff and watching the videos… It’s great. I can’t verbalize what it means to me, but I did want to take a sec to say thanks.
You folks rock!
As you may already be aware, Lone Survivor is an adaptation of Marcus Luttrell’s book regarding his experiences during a SEAL Team operation in Afghanistan. Given this, I don’t have any intent on analyzing the plot because to do so feels disrespectful, but instead, I’ll take a look at how the movie itself functions. Read the rest of this entry
Let’s all let out a collective sigh and watch the Dracula Untold trailer.
Me thinks the movie trailer doth say too much! Read the rest of this entry
Justice League: War is based on the first few issues from Justice League’s New 52 reboot in the comics a few years back. I thought it sucked back then, and it sucks now.
And by sucks, I mean this movie is boring.
Seriously, it’s really boring. I’ve seen this movie within the last month and I couldn’t remember the plot. At all. I had to look it up and then it came back to me. That is not a good sign. Justice League: The Flashpoint Paradox wasn’t great, but at least I remembered what it was about. This… I didn’t care. The movie totally failed at getting me to care about how the Justice League gets together, if anything bad happens to the people of earth, the heroes… I don’t care. The only really memorable moment in the movie is when Batman tells The Flash "You do clean, efficient work."
Justice League: War is a snoozefest – I give it a 2 out of 10. How do you screw up a movie where the Justice League fights Darkseid for the fate of earth. Like this.
I gotta tell yah, these DC Animated Universe Justice League movies have gone way downhill.
I love the idea of time traveling to the past creating a mishap in the future, but frankly, Justice League: The Flashpoint Paradox just doesn’t work. Nobody gives a rats butt about The Flash’s mom. I did like what they did with Batman here, but ultimately, this movie is a few bagels short of a dozen… or something something metaphor.
The characters in this movie… Oy, The Reverse Flash… he looks like The Zoid’s evil brother or something. This guy gives Wario a lot of credibility… you know what I’m saying? I guess I’m saying that the movie’s antagonist sucks and I’m not even sure how he’s aware of the paradox or why The Flash himself can’t figure it out. It’s just… well, this movie is ass is what it is.
It’s not boring, but I can’t recommend Justice League: The Flashpoint Paradox. I’m giving it a 4 out of 10. There’s no rewatchability here and it’s barely worth a look for even hardcore fans.
This beginning/midish point of season 2 of Game of Thrones is kinda plodding. The little that is going on isn’t especially interesting and it’s as though every single scene is developing a different thread of the overall plot. I think I’d rather they devote each episodes to two plot threads instead of five, but that’s life. Read the rest of this entry
Now that Season 2 of Game of Thrones is in full swing and the characters continue to multiply, it’s become more of a “I at least know who these people are, so I’ll care about them” sort of thing rather than trying to sort this all out in my head. Hopefully, after a few more episodes, everything will become clear. Or clearer. Read the rest of this entry
Everything else got rebooted, and in 2011, it was Planet of the Apes turn. I did like this movie, but it contains absolutely no surprises. Did you watch the trailer? That’s as good a summary as any.
I liked the allusions to the original: Caesar, Bright Eyes, “Get Your Paws Off Me, You Damn Dirty Ape,” all that stuff was fun. I have no idea where Andy Serkis ends and digital animators begin, but the performance is excellent. James Franco… you know, it’s James Franco. He’s a fine actor, but he’s just very James Franco. It was fun to see John Lithgow do his thing, particularly doing something I’d never seen him do before.
The pacing is a little slow… I thought for sure this movie was over two hours, but it actually clocks in at 1:46. The bad guys are all super flat an uninteresting, especially the jerk and the ape reserve… it does help the audience cheer for Caesar, because you do want him to triumph over the bad guys, but then, it seems like you’re supposed to cheer for James Franco, and there’s really not much to cheer about as the movie goes on.
Not only does this movie not doing anything super risky (although I did appreciate the strong animal rights message) or surprising, it’s very clear exactly how the next sequel will go. You can tell exactly how humanity will fall and the apes will take their place as the dominate species on the planet, so we can’t expect any surprises in Dawn of the Planet of the Apes, either.
Rise of the Planet of the Apes is what it promises – no more, no less. I liked it, but I certainly didn’t love it: I’m giving it a 7 out of 10. It does a lot of things right, but it’s kinda plodding and takes no risks.
Hey remember that gif of me getting hit in the face with hotdogs? 20 bucks in Internet high fives if you add “NOT ALL MEN” to it.
— Antonella Inserra (@Nellachronism) June 21, 2014
I guess I need 20 bucks in Internet high fives because here we are:
Over the last few months, I’ve become a fan of the Nostalgia Chick show and Twitter, so now, I find myself following show stars @thelindsayellis and @Nellachronism on Twitter, came upon the above request and… yeah. It’s Saturday morning and I’m editing together a woman getting hit in the face with hot dogs. Life is most unusual.
(In case you’re wondering, the clips are from the freddy got fingered episode.)
I recently wrote that the Robocop reboot wasn’t great, but it wasn’t boring, either. Today I come down from the mountaintop to tell you that The Bourne Legacy is Bourning as hell. (See what I did there?)
I was wondering how they’d make a Bourne movie without Bourne and the answer is this isn’t really a movie. It just this thing that exists for 135 minutes.
Or in other words, it’s not good.
There’s not much to tell, really… what a waste of Jeremy Renner and Edward Norton. Renner’s character isn’t interesting – at all – so there’s nothing to latch onto. The movie feels like it’s five hours long… the word "plodding" comes to mind. The fact that the events of this film are happening parallel to The Bourne Ultimatum is just a distraction. (They must refer to this at least five times – the movie bludgeons the audience to death with this concept. Or, in my case, to sleep. I actually dozed off for a few minutes. That never happens to me. I didn’t fall asleep during Armageddon, for Christ’s sake.)
This is the worst movie I’ve seen in a while – further analysis if futile. I’m giving The Bourne Legacy a 3 out of 10 and I’ll leave it at that.
The Robocop reboot wasn’t boring and I didn’t hate it, but it just didn’t work very well. It had some interesting ideas but didn’t convey them in a passionate way. The biggest issue is probably that Robocop himself is boring. I didn’t care about him when he was Alex, I didn’t care about him or his family once he became Robocop. I liked that they didn’t just rehash the original and the callbacks were clever, but they don’t work. While the commercials and news programs in the original felt like organic parts of this universe, the Samuel L. Jackson stuff almost feels like it’s from a different movie. Jackson, Gary Oldman and Michael Keaton all turn in their usual, high quality performance, but it’s not enough. One area this movie falls super short in (especially in comparison to the original) is in the antagonist area. These guys just don’t scare me… and the other cops treat Alex as if he was out on vacation when he comes back to work as Robocop… it’s kinda bizarre.
The original is outstanding – I recommend watching that instead. This is a movie that just didn’t need a remake. I give it a 5 out of 10 and I’m going back to the watch original maybe as soon as this evening.
"This one’s straight off my DIEtunes playlist!"
Holy hell. (Literally.) Why does this exist? This new live stage show, Beetlejuice Graveyard Revue, debuted on February 8 of 2014, so it’s not for Halloween, and a second Beetlejuice movie is still a pipe dream, so.. what is the deal here? What were they thinking?!? Read the rest of this entry