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Star Wars Rebels LOOKS Disney-riffic, FEELS like Clone Wars

Now that Star Wars: The Clone Wars is over on Cartoon Network, we’re getting Star Wars Rebels on Disney XD. The trailer isn’t giving us much, but Disney/Star Wars has dropped a bunch of "meet the characters" styled shorts, and they’re much more revealing. Read the rest of this entry

Laurel Hill Lime Tortilla Chips (vegan stuff)

I found out about lime Tortilla chips some time before I became vegan and, as it turns out, all of the big brand lime corn chips include dairy, so that doesn’t work for me. Fortunately, Laurel Hill hooked it up – so, I no longer have to live a lime Tortilla chip free existence. Not exactly a tragedy, I know, but if you’re vegan and you like snacks, then you know where I’m coming from. A good snack is hard to find, and Laurel Hill’s Lime Tortilla Chips are worth trying.

Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (movie review)

Harrison Ford and Sean Connery. In the same movie. On an adventure. What more could you ask for? Sure, Connery isn’t exactly playing James Bond in this movie, but then, Indiana Jones kinda is James Bond already, so we’re set on that front. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade has it all.
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Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is the worst movie in the franchise… (movie review)

I’ve seen a lot of bad movies. A lot of bad movies. But, there are subtle levels of terrible films. In the case of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, it’s certainly the worst movie in the franchise, but it’s hardly one of the worst movies ever. It’s not even the most disappointing movie ever. While it is fair to call it a bad movie, the reasons I hear are usually off base. They usually go something like this: Read the rest of this entry

What's in a name? Nothing. Especially if you're selling tea.

In Act 2, scene 2 of Romeo and Juliet, Shakespeare writes:

Juliet
O Romeo, Romeo! wherefore art thou Romeo?
Deny thy father, and refuse thy name;
Or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love,
And I’ll no longer be a Capulet.

Romeo
[Aside.] Shall I hear more, or shall I speak at this?

Juliet

’Tis but thy name that is my enemy;
Thou art thyself though, not a Montague.
What’s Montague? it is nor hand, nor foot,
Nor arm, nor face, nor any other part
Belonging to a man. O! be some other name:
What’s in a name? that which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet;
So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call’d,
Retain that dear perfection which he owes
Without that title. Romeo, doff thy name;
And for that name, which is no part of thee,
Take all myself.

Ya see, that’s all fancy talk for "You can all "chocolate" "dog shiz" and it won’t alter the taste; chocolate tastes like chocolate no matter what you call it.

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Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince (movie review)

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince and The Deathly Hallows were the only books in the series I had read before seeing the movies. Perhaps this is why I was so very disappointed in this movie, even if the climax did thrill me.

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The Wolf of Wall Street (movie review)

There is no one more surprised than me that a post entitled The Wolf of Wall Street has nothing to do with any of my dogs, but here we are. At one hundred and eighty minutes, The Wolf of Wall Street is a redundant mouthful, but it’s still a lot of fun. Read the rest of this entry

Unnecessarily Awesome: Star Wars Tow Hitch

We don’t have the need for a tow hitch, but if I was towing something, I would certainly have to rock a Darth Vader tow hitch. If I was towing something super heavy, I’d have to tell the tow hitch, "Impressive – most impressive." As far as I can tell, there’s no way to make them light up… which would probably be distracting to other drivers and is a completely unnecessary feature as well as totally useless, but would still be cool. Oh well… I don’t need this product anyway.

We are watching Verizon FiOS on demand

We’ve watched a fair amount of movies using Verizon FIOS on demand, and I gotta say, I feel like this image is indicative of the entire experience. This particular picture is from when we tried to watch Dallas Buyers Club, and as you can see, it did not go well. We ended up abandoning the Verizon set top box and streaming the movie via Verizon’s website, which worked OK – there was a weird aspect ratio issue, but it was still watchable.

Image distortion issues are just a piece of the puzzle; we’ve had problems with pausing, rewinding, HD… it just goes on and on. But, we just keep going back for some reason. I guess we love convenience.

To be fair, we have had problem-free experiences – they’ve just been few and far between. Hopefully, as time goes on, the service will improve.

Clark Gregg is in The Usual Suspects

Agent Phil Coulson, the bad ass who makes the Marvel Movie and TV Universe go round, is in The Usual Suspects, one of the best movies ever. It’s only for a minute, when the cop is on the phone trying to a translator that knows Hungarian, but that’s him on the left, as noticed by Dr. Girlfriend.

An awesome movie just got awesome-er!

Disney World vs Disneyland: Star Tours

The biggest difference between Star Tours at Disneyland and Star Tours at Walt Disney World is where the attraction is located.

That’s it.

You see, if you’re at Disneyland, you’ll need to head over to Tomorrowland (at light speed, I presume), where as if you’re at Walt Disney World, you’ll need to bypass the Great Movie Ride at Disney’s Hollywood Studios and wander over to Star Tours. I should mention that the outside of the ride at DHS is superior – it looks like Endor out there – but that’s about it. Once you get inside, it’s the exact same thing. The waiting areas are identical. The scratched up 3D glasses are identical. (Maybe make these not so crappy and have them look like the podracer goggles, because, you know… you’re Disney.) The ride is identical. Read the rest of this entry

Captain America Patriot Cologne is a thing that exists

Captain-America-Patriot-Cologne-box

It’s MY attack plan.

Some folks might want to be Captain America, but Dr. Girlfriend realized I want to smell like him.

She’s not wrong.

I’m sure you’re wondering:  What does a patriot smell like? Read the rest of this entry

Attack of the Non-Killer Tomatoes

Look, sometimes the tomatoes don’t kill – they’re just behind you. At the grocery store. They’re not up to no good; they just want to make sure you’re clear on where they are hanging out.

That is all.

Baffling Movie Trailers: The Hero of Color City and The Maze Runner

This week on Baffling Movie Trailers, we’ve got two new movies coming that we’ve already seen before. I guess it’s open season on plagiarism!

Oh Hai, The Hero of Color City – uhm, you can’t just make a "toys come to life when nobody’s looking" movie at this point in history. It’s just not going to fly. Disney is going to be up in your grill about this at some point, I imagine. I’m no Toy Story fan, but if you’re going to rip somebody off, at least do a better job with the concept than they did. ("Different" does not mean "better.") I appreciate that this a movie for children, but just because they’re kids doesn’t mean they’re idiots – this movie looks awful. It looks like it was developed on the Game Cube platform or something.

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It's a Captain America: The Winter Soldier celebration here at CJ!

I love me some Captain America, and I couldn’t be more delighted that another flick is dropping starring Chris Evans as the Star Spangled Avenger. I’m not completely in love with the way they’re writing him (one second, it seems like the Steve Rogers I know, but the next second, he’s firing automatic rifles and hurling people to their death), but I’m pleased with the way Evans is portraying the roll. Also, I’m a big Winter Soldier fan, and I’m curious to see the movie’s take on it. Unlike before Captain America: The First Avenger, my expectations are dialed up to eleven: the trailer gives the impression that the movie is interesting, and we’ve already seen what most of the players can do with their characters, and, as history has shown us, the second movie of a series is often the best one (Matrix trilogy aside), so all signs point to a good movie.

We’ll have to wait and see…

Oh, the celebration part – I almost forgot. Well, we should have some Captain America-centric posts going for the rest of the week, and maybe beyond. Stay tuned for more stuff!

Jesse “The Body” Ventura – a professional wrestler, a movie star and a governor

jesse-the-body-ventura-promo

Look how he blurs! Standard definition can not contain him!

Sometimes, I think about the career of Jesse “The Body” Ventura and I get a little misty-eyed.  What an amazing country the United States of America is; truly, a land of opportunity.  Just look at the career path:  he was a professional wrestler, then a movie star, then a governor and now he’s on his second TV show.  You kinda have to wipe away a tear and say, “God bless America.”  If you aren’t convinced, take a look at this and tell me that you’re not proud this man rose to the rank of Governor in the United States.  Tell me.  I dare you.

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Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2 (movie review)

I really enjoyed the first Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs – interesting story, characters and themes… self obsession, greed, perception isn’t reality, even the best of intentions can have unforeseen consequences – stuff like that. Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2 reminds us that all life is precious.

Well, it reminds us that most life is precious.
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Saving Mr. Banks (movie review)

You see that trailer up there? Don’t watch it. It’s both misleading and sorta ruins the movie. But if you did already watch it, that’s OK – you’ll probably forget the trailer once you start watching Saving Mr. Banks because the two are soooooo far removed from each other it hardly matters. This doesn’t mean that the movie is bad (it’s quite good, actually), but what’s presented in the trailer is a lighted hearted comedic bit of entertainment history, but what you get is a ton of hard hitting drama with moments of levity in between. Read the rest of this entry

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (movie review)

I feel that once you get through The Goblet of Fire, the translation from page to screen begins to suffer… or, perhaps these stories were not meant to be adapted in this way. Whatever the case, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix is not nearly as interesting to watch as it was to read. But, I don’t have any intention to compare the novels and movies so instead, I’ll just pay strict attention to what’s on the screen. However, I do want to note that things that bug me about the movie didn’t bug me about the book. Read the rest of this entry

Baffling Movie Trailers: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014) & God’s Not Dead

I watched the movie trailers for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014) and God’s Not Dead and they both baffled me. Take a look!

What? I… what?

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