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Category Archives: election 2012

United States of America 2012 Presidential Election Democrat Barack Obama Republican

Halo 4 is awesome, but not perfect

Halo 4 is awesome, but not perfect – at least that’s what i heard from the video game website IGN. Not having played Halo since I got stuck in that hanger in Halo 2, I’m a little out of my element, but I did read the reviews, and the reviews are impressive.

But take a close look at that score – 9.8. That’s a precise score, huh? I’m not saying that video games aren’t serious business and don’t deserve a specific number grade, because they do, but think about this for a second. We can deduce that since the game is receiving the Editors’ Choice seal of approval that their system’s perfect score is a 10, but the game didn’t merit a perfect score. 10 would be perfect, but Halo 4 got a 9.8. Why not a 10? What merits a two tenths deduction? That is bizarre. Was it the packaging? Is the disc too shiny? Did Master Chief not stick the landing? If anyone knows, hit me up.  Or, if you have copy of IGN’s rubric, that’s even better!

 

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Obama Wins Second Term, Fox News Credits Mainstream Media

Oh Fox News – the gift that just keeps on giving. I try to stay off their site because they just make it too easy… it’d be like if I were a hunter (and I’m not) and I did all my hunting at a game preserve where they kept the birds under lock and key until right when I got to that spot and then they flushed them out in front of me… and yet, I still ended up shooting my hunting partner in the face. That’s a good enough analogy for what has happened as President Obama has won a second term without anyone officially saying who won Florida and it’s 29 Electoral Votes (and it looks like Obama will be declared the winner of Florida) when Fox news posts an article that neither blames Mitt Romney for losing nor credits Obama for winning. Instead, it’s the mainstream media that unfairly influenced the election with their liberal bias while forgetting that Fox is part of the mainstream media. Read the rest of this entry

I voted!

If you’ve dropped by the site in the last year or so, you probably know who I voted for, but if there was any doubt, check it:

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Yeah, I went with Barry O.  That’s how I roll.  Things were going well at my polling place early this morning, but I recommend you vote as soon as possible, just in case there is a problem – then you’ll have time to sort it out.

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Go vote!  It’s the coolest!

Don’t forget to vote!

Today is election day – don’t forget to vote!  They might even give you one of those bad ass “I voted!” stickers!

If you haven’t decided who to vote for yet, don’t let me sway you…

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I’m voting for Obama: Part 2

Barack Obama 2008I had planned an entire series of “I’m voting for Obama” posts, but Hurricane Sandy screwed that up. Anyway, here is the penultimate post on why I’m voting for Obama.

(Unfortunately, I don’t have time to unleash the humongous essays on various issues I had planned, so I’m only providing the Cliff Notes version on limited topics.) Read the rest of this entry

How much does Big Bird cost?

mitt-romneyDuring the first presidential debate (I’m only one debate behind – awesome!) Governor Romney mentioned that while he did love Big Bird, if he were elected president, he would stop the subsidy to PBS.  This comment has inspired me to do two very scary things:  1) look up details on government spending and 2) math.

In case you missed Romney’s quote from the debate, here it is, in all of it’s out of context glory:

“I’m sorry Jim, I’m going to stop the subsidy to PBS. I like PBS, I actually love Big Bird. I like you too, but I’m not going to keep on spending money on things to borrow money from China to pay for.”

Read the rest of this entry

New Jersey Absentee Ballot and the awesome third party names

One of my buddies is not able to make it home to vote this year, and he is getting his New Jersey Absentee Ballot on.  Kind soul that he is and being well aware of my pension for all things wacky, he sent me a pic so I could enjoy the names of the various political parties.

Read the rest of this entry

Girl to Romney: “The GluteBoost is working!”

mitt-romney-bends-down-in-front-of-school-girl

“Did you ever see that episode of Diff’rent Strokes “The Bicycle Man?” Never mind…”

Obviously, this photograph is hilarious.  The girl looks pleasantly surprised while Mitt Romney is wearing more of a “I built that” sort of look on his face.  So, while I’m sure the options are limitless, I prefer to maintain that the young lady was pleasantly surprised by the ample junk in Governor Romney’s trunk.  Badonkadonk.

The caption “The GluteBoost is working!” comes to mind because of this “news” story, in which a 61-year-old teacher named Ellen Vick reported that a student put something in her coffee cup.  My understanding is that investigators believe that a student put three capsules of GluteBoost into her coffee, and apparently, GluteBoost is an “All Natural Buttocks Enhancement Supplement.”  That is awesome.  Apparently, the kids like a big ass and certainly believe that it is never to late too tap dat.  WORD.

HIT THE MUSIC!!!

I’m voting for Obama: Part 1

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I’ve decided that for part 1 of my “I’m voting for Obama” series, I’d point you in the direction of an infinitely superior writer in the personage of Mr. Peter David:

Read the rest of this entry

Mitt Romney, budding standup comedian

mitt-romney-laughingWho would have guessed that Republican Presidential Candidate Mitt Romney would be so hilarious?  The dude is straight up funny, and that’s no lie.  Here are some of his funniest lines from the campaign trail.

Read the rest of this entry

Romney’s Mouth, Meet Romney’s Foot – Video Edition

mitt-romneySince he’s already done the “Romney’s Mouth, Meet Romney’s Foot – Statement Edition,” I guess he thought another round was due.  I imagine that right about now, President Obama is sitting in a room, consulting a calendar. “Hm… it’s not my birthday, it’s not Christmas… Well, either way, I guess I should call Mitt Romney and thank him for his thoughtful gift.” Read the rest of this entry

“Of course you realize this means war” (or: seriously, I’m pissed at Mitt Romney)

mitt-romneyI like to poke fun at Mitt Romney as he’s someone I genuinely disagree with.  Now, his status as “someone I genuinely disagree with” has changed after the events of the last few days, which I will briefly recount in the order they occurred. Read the rest of this entry

Random Texts Sent Between Mitt Romney and His Campaign Manager

mitt-romneyPoliticians must text, right?  It’s a standard mode of communication these days and I’d have to imagine it’s an invaluable tool during the constant on the go of a presidential campaign.  Here’s what I imagine the texts exchanged between Mitt Romney and his campaign manager look like.

Also, 10 bucks says Mitt uses a Blackberry.

Read the rest of this entry

Oh Republicans, you so CRAZY (Or: Why Ryan and Christie?)

So…  let me see if I can understand this.

Mitt Romney has chosen Paul Ryan to be his running mate.  When I heard this, I said, “Who?  Oh, wait… now I remember – that fucking guy?  That’s crazy.”  Read the rest of this entry

Obama Bo-den 2012

obama-bo-den-2012If you thought I wouldn’t vote for a ticket that had a dog listed as vice president, well… you were mistaken.

more Election 2012 at creativejamie.com/category/election-2012/

With Fall Election Looming, Republicans Tell College Students and Graduates To Go F*ck Themselves

I still have a student loan floating around out there.  It’s not a ton of money, but the Senate Republicans went out of their way to remind me that I need to start moving this debt around from one short term interest free credit card to the next.  Today’s vote doesn’t effect me, because as I understand it, this failure to keep student loan rates low only applies to Stafford Loans, but why pay interest when you don’t have to?  If I’ve learned anything from Republicans, it’s that I need to exploit every loop hole and remind people less fortunate than myself that I hate them.

Probably not going to do the latter.

Read the rest of this entry

Barack Obama stars in The Graying

movie-preview

The world told him, “No you can’t.” Read the rest of this entry

Santorum Wins Alabama And Mississippi, But He Didn’t Win Much

Rick Santorum can run around with his hair on fire telling everyone how he won the Alabama And Mississippi primaries, but a closer look at the numbers reveals his boasts to be wild exaggeration.  Sure, Santorum spent less money than Mitt Romney, but this isn’t a foot race, and the former Senator needs to realize that.

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In Alabama, Santorum scooped up 34.5% – meanwhile, Newt “I can’t believe I’m still in the race, either” Gingrich took 29.3% and Romney took an even 29%.  Without a doubt, Santorum won, but it’s not like he cleaned Romney’s clock by 10+ percentage points.  I’m also fairly certain I read somewhere that Romney didn’t campaign in Alabama…

The Mississippi numbers are even closer:  32.8% for Santorum, Gingrich in second again with 31.2% and Romney bringing up the rear with 30.6.  When the spread’s less than 2.5 points, the phrase “narrow victory” comes to mind.  Also, check out the balls on Gingrich:  “If you’re the front-runner and keep coming in third, you’re not much of a front-runner.”  Err… you know you didn’t come in first in anything last night, right?

Here’s the real problem:  the Republican primary is no longer a winner take all contest – just because you win a state doesn’t mean you get all of the delegates, and given that the contests have all been relatively close, it’s a fair to guess that the delegates will be divided up fairly evenly.  And even worse for Santorum and Gingrich, they’re way behind Romney in the delegate count, so dividing delegates nearly even with him isn’t a great way to eat up his lead.

republican-delegate-count-march-2012

As you can see, Romney is handing Santorum his ASS in total delegate count.  A 243 delegate count lead over your closest rival is a fairly significant beating, and while I understand that there are 1358 delegates left for the taking, it’s hard to believe that Santorum will ever be able to catch Romney, especially if about 30% of voters in Mississippi & Alabama are willing to vote for a Mormon.  If Santorum can’t blow Romney out in these states, then he’s never going to catch up.

more Election 2012 at creativejamie.com/category/election-2012/

Rick Santorum: Running a 20th Century Campaign in the 21st Century

It’s hard for me to believe that Rick Santorum is obtuse, but I don’t know what else to think.  Surely he realizes that as a candidate for president, people are recording what he says and in the 21st Century, I can go right to my home computer and check what he’s saying against fact.

Rick Santorum, FEB 25, 2012:

rick-santorumPresident Obama has said he wants everybody in America to go to college. What a snob!  There are good, decent men and women who go out and work hard every day, and put their skills to test, who aren’t taught by some liberal college professor [who] tries to indoctrinate them. I understand why he wants you to go to college. He wants to remake you in his image. I want to create jobs so people can remake their children into their image, not his.”

Barack Obama, FEB 24, 2009:

obama-comic-book“I ask every American to commit to at least one year or more of higher education or career training.  This can be community college or a four-year school; vocational training or an apprenticeship.  But whatever the training may be, every American will need to get more than a high school diploma.  And dropping out of high school is no longer an option.”

Ooooooooooooooooooooookaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.

Let’s take Santorum’s statement point by point.

“President Obama has said he wants everybody in America to go to college. What a snob!”
Does Obama like Starbucks?  I’m pretty sure you’re not a snob unless you like Starbucks or your wife drives multiple Cadillacs.  But yeah, somehow Santorum gets ‘college’ out of ‘at least one year or more of higher education or career training.’  Not sure how he managed that.

“There are good, decent men and women who go out and work hard every day, and put their skills to test, who aren’t taught by some liberal college professor [who] tries to indoctrinate them.”

Well, lots of people have jobs (even high paying jobs) who don’t have college degrees.  One of my best friends works on cars and makes a fine living, but doesn’t have a college degree.  (Full disclosure:  after attending some college, he opted for automotive technical training…  I know, that kinda sounds like what Obama was talking about.)

I’m fairly certain all college professors aren’t liberal.  Especially at Harvard.  You know, Harvard - where Obama got his law degree and was elected editor of the Harvard Law Review.  That Harvard, which is not especially known the world over for its liberal leanings.

“I understand why he wants you to go to college. He wants to remake you in his image. I want to create jobs so people can remake their children into their image, not his.”
Huh?  College turns you into Obama?  So if I go on to graduate school, I’ll end up teaching college, working in my community, winning a local election, then a senate seat and finally I’ll be the second black president?  And I get to adopt another dog?  Sign me up!  I really feel that one makes children in their own image when you actually make them; that kinda takes care of itself organically.  (Unless you have a friendly mailman or pool boy.)  I would also challenge the idea that presidents can create jobs – I suppose they can propose spending legislation to Congress that could create jobs… or, you know, the President could hire some dude to walk the dog.

Maybe Santorum got carried away when he rattled off the above quote; in the heat of the moment, he said what he thought that crowd would respond to on that day.  But in the 21st century, you can’t play to the room in a sound bite culture.

more Election 2012 at creativejamie.com/category/election-2012/

Republican Primary Results That Don’t Count For Anything From States Where Republicans Don’t Live, Vote Or Care

Whew!  That title just rolls right off your tongue!

This post is all about numbers, but don’t let that scare you off.  I hate those smug bastards, but sometimes, simply looking them over and seeing which ones are small and which ones are big can tell us a lot.

For example, Minnesota is 21st in population in the United States with a count of 5,303,925 in 2010.  Colorado is 22nd with 5,029,196 and Missouri is 18th with 5,988,927.  But apparently, either no Republicans live there, don’t vote, or they don’t show up for elections that don’t count for anything.  Or they think the candidates suck.

That’s right, folks; apparently, the Republican Primaries in Colorado, Missouri and Minnesota not only had fairly low turnout, but they’re not awarding any delegates to the winner – so I guess all of this means nothing as the states have not awarded delegates to any of the candidates, meaning until they do, we don’t know who they’ll vote for at the Republican National Convention.  Apparently, this is all tied to these states having their elections too soon, but what this means for awarding their delegates, I don’t know, and who cares?  Nobody voted anyway.  Here are the results:

colorado-minnesota-missouri-primary-results-2012

The only thing that annoys me more than the Electoral College is the way we pick candidates.  This is pathetic!  In Colorado, a total of 66,027 showed up.  In Minnesota, which we already noted has slightly more residents than Colorado, only 48,695 could muster up the courage to hit the polls and in Missouri, 251,868  got those classy “I voted!” stickers.  Now that’s a lot more than Colorado or Minnesota, but as I always like to point out, Brooklyn has a population of 2,504,700, so I don’t see any of these guys doing very well in a race for Borough President.

Yet the most shocking thing of all is that Rick Santorum swept the day!  And, when you google his name, spreadingsantorum.com is now downgraded to the 4th option in natural search results, so things are all coming up Rick!

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Your damn right I +1'd it. Man, Google - that is one awkward expression you've got there.

So I guess Santorum is the latest flavor of the month in the “Anybody But Mitt Romney” parade and as Newt Gingrich didn’t finish any better than third in all three races, he is of course not dropping out.  Why would he drop out now?  He only failed to capture anything worth reporting in the state where the most people showed up to vote in an election where you essentially just had to show up and shake hands with the 12 people voting at each precinct…

Well, I guess it’s time for Mitt Romney to tear into Rick Santorum with a wave of negative ads from his Super PAC that he can’t control, so get ready, Maine – you’ve got some commercials coming your way concerning why a frothy mixture won’t make a good president.

more Election 2012 at creativejamie.com/category/election-2012/

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