I have now switched to a 0-10 scale for scoring movies. I don’t know why I keep switching… but I do keep switching. Sorry about that!
I have now switched to a 0-100% scale for scoring movies. Think of it as a grade on a test:
90-100 = A
80-89 = B
70-79 = C
60-69 = D
0-59 = F – an exact number under 59 just illustrates how spectacular the failure was.
While I won’t give every book, comic book, movie review or music review a score, I will, at times, break out the old Reviews Rating System. It’s a 1 through 5 system, 1 being the worst, 5 being the best and may your respective Deity help us if I have to issue someone a zero. If you’re worried about spoilers or just don’t want to read the review, scroll through the post quickly and you’ll see the score, big as life.
My Rating: 2.5 out of 5
- 1 = incomprehensible: like sitting in traffic, going to the dentist or watching Hulk Hogan in Suburban Commando… or Thunder in Paradise. I get chills just thinking about it…
- 2 = bad: the plot feels like something out of the Twilight series…
“And so the lion fell in love with the lamb…” he murmured.
I looked away, hiding my eyes as I thrilled to the word.
“What a stupid lamb,” I sighed.
“What a sick ,masochistic lion.”
Damn you, tweens! “As I thrilled to the word?” Wow. That’s epic. She used ‘thrill’ as a verb without an object. That’s great writing. Just. Fucking. Great. Twilight.
- 3 = average: it wasn’t great, but it had a beginning, middle and end.
- 4 = good: better than most, but no one is going to study it for hundreds of years
- 5 = excellent: you’d sell your grandmother’s false teeth for it